Saturday, March 24, 2012

productivity...it's a relative term

I'm about to write my second post for this month, I'm not so sure if this is a good thing, maybe I should be filling my time better? I'm here at the library to do an assignment however I left my headphones at home. my goal of finishing that assignment have now been dashed to pieces and a new idea is born spontaneous blog post, usually when I sit down to greet you guys with charm and charisma, there is often a point, a thought on point, one that I hope will entertain or inspire. Today I feel like like I'm on stage with absolutely nothing planned, scary but some what liberating and exciting. But what to share?

 I'll think out loud and throw out a few ideas, I turn 21 in less than a week? that feels too dull, too personal something that you might not relate to or think on. I mean don't get me wrong I'm excited to celebrate the last 21 years. Life it's a beautiful gift. With these years I've become well, who I am, I've got a head full of knowledge and facts that bounce around. I've got a heart full of experiences that get pumped through my veins and warm my body. and I've got a soul that knows there is so much more to learn and grow on. I feel like that's enough, I don't need to celebrate or go on and on about it but I have time and empty pages that need to be written for the curious eyes that linger here looking for something so I progress to new ideas.

I could blog about my recent tanning experience, it's a well know fact that I'm a sun lover, a warm day seeker, a complete vitamin D junkie. I mean nothing kisses the skin better than the sun's sweet rays nothing warms the heart like warm bare feet on a nice day. (not quite as romantic I know but still it's a feeling I truly adore). Ambition, she is my bittersweet friend, I mean what more could she be for someone like me who follows whims, chases dreams, and has list a dreams that in size rivals that of mountains? Ambition, I had decided to write a letter in the sun so I could get my feelings out, get a tan and around feel revitalize and rejuvenated. I even brought a book for afterwards, sunlight reading is simply magical. Oh dear sweet ambition I began my letter "Dear" and that was all. Now before think this is just me being discreet and not wanting to share the Identify of the letter receiver it's not, I did not even get that far before I laid my head to rest and ponder out how I was going to go about this letter, and which person I wanted to write first. It didn't take long before I had drifted off into a delightful nap in the noon day sun, waking up feeling a little toasty I decide it's time to roll over, even out, and read. I get lost in this book I find myself entertained while learning, my favorite way to be. Hours have past at this point only to go inside cherry red the suns sweet kisses took a turn for the bitter like my last sweet kiss, letter not written, however the book had a nice bite out of it and was rather enjoyed. Instead of being sad I felt amused, I found the whole situation rather funny. Maybe this notion is where what I will blog about.

While reading, and yes I figure a few of you are curious to know what I was reading, it's Simply Sane by Debbie Bowen, (Don't judge I'm addicted to short books about positive thought and push you to be a better person in this world.) I'll begin again, while reading this book, I had the thought, I'm a silver lining junkie. I don't know if the thought had too much to do with the book itself but it came to me and It sparked something in me. I cannot help but look at the sliver-lining, fall on the side of hope, the side never give up, believe that nothing is over even after the fat lady sings. I can't help but believe that every person is worth a chance, everyone can change, no one is perfect, and that love is the cure. And it's strange because life hasn't exactly been a picture perfect picnic, my parade has been rained on, Real Life has taken her swings at me, and I've been made to take the long way, and I've chosen the rough road a few times, through my experiences you would think experience would have made a realist out of me, sometimes people look at me and wonder how through everything I could still be so optimistic, so cheery and bubbly still be me. I don't know maybe through it all I've learned that there is no road to long as long as you get back home, there is always ALWAYS hope because sometimes life is more like the movies than we think, I mean they had to get their ideas from somewhere. I've seen changes and meet outstanding people just as giving them a chance, we all become what we are expected to become so expect the best from everyone and it's all you'll see. Maybe I'm this way because I force myself to see if from other perspectives, see it how I would if I were in their shoes, simply see that we're all flawed and if my best is good enough why shouldn't everyone's best be good enough? and for that matter how do I know what their best is? I just believe the quote I once heard "assume everyone is doing the best they can, where they are, with what they've got." What you focus on is what you see. I focus on the good and it's all I can see. I can't help it. Now the real question is: Is this outlook a blessing or a curse? I feel like it's a blessing I mean it works for me it keeps me happy and it keeps me sane. And honestly I don't think this world was created for sadness. I think each day has hope and why else would we be put here? And that blessing that idea, that knowledge I think is where I owe most of my optimistic beliefs, that is where my heart finds it's comfort and it's notion to continue on in positiveness. 

 Well the library is going to close. I've accomplished a lot. not quite what I had planned but life is full of unexpected adventures. Embrace them. Live life, live freely but safely follow the right guidelines. Smile. Laugh everyday even if it's for no reason, even if you have to fake it LAUGH. breathe and relax, and as usual don't get carree'd away.

xo carree

ps I'll proof read this again later. 

Monday, March 5, 2012

comic relief in life.

Laughter. It heals practically everything. Well there are better ways for deeper healing but on a simple level laughter can fix a day. It can be a turning point. It always makes me feel better. So our story begins just a few hours ago.

My little cousin likes to play soccer with me. Before you get to impressed with me let me say that he is in 1st grade, and is more excited about how far I can kick and how I can "out-smart" him. So I'm no star just a big kid a little kid looks up to with long legs, and far kicks. He taught me some tricks and we did drills where I was very quickly reminded that I have two left feet. VERY entertaining! However these are not the shannagins of which I have intended to blog about, the story I wish to recount to you my dear readers is that happened while we were playing. But to tell that story I have to preface with something that happened a few months ago.

A good friend of mine, one who confessed to wanting to be mentioned in my "famed" blog and now has the chance but it will for sure NOT be how they would like it done but it gives me quite a kick to do it this way, any ways I digress, so back to the story. While chatting and swapping stories to pass the time with my friend they told me of their childhood adventures, and a few misadventures. I was quite entertained however my FAVORITE story was one that involved a younger version of my friend, greeting his daddy after a long day of work. Sounds picture perfect and adorable right? WRONG, my friend went to rest their hand on the truck bed unknowingly right on top of a bee, which flew into the collar of their shirt and stung them right in the neck. When they told me this I thought I was going to die laughing. I'll admit, it wasn't the best thing a friend should do. But I couldn't help it. now this is the reader digest to the story, but I got a huge kick out of it, anything I would think about it I was laugh to myself.

If you're grinning now I take it you've figured out the road I'm on and where this is going.

Setting? Check. Preface? Check. Now it's time for the story. So the intense soccer battle continues when I hear a buzz in my ear, instant panic, my heart races and I jumped out of my skin, swatting my hair and trying to shoo this tiny terrorist out of my hair. The buzzing stops. VICTORY! SUCCESS! Those who know me know I fall slightly on the snarky smug side. I grin and think to myself, "yeah no bee is getting this neck, pshh I got this." So we keep playing. With my "incredible skills" I kick the soccer ball under my brother's car. Rake in hand we try to get the ball out from under the car, midprocess I hear the buzzing again and there is NOTHING I can do to stop it. The little beast ended up tangled in my hair. The rest is all downhill from there,   I felt him fly in to the back of my shirt. Defeat. He was stuck and I was doomed. Unbelievable I was trapped. He got me, stung in the shoulder.

Ever had to eat words? Better yet ever had to mentally eat your own words and feel the irony tickle your tummy? Yeah. Best part? Telling your little siblings about both incidents and getting laughed just as hard by two people. I never have to eat my words, I'm too clever, and yet today I had to eat them. VERY entertaining. But you know what? I laughed. it was so funny, it was so great, it was the perfect ironic comic relief life could have handed me. I laughed my little head off, and I hope that the thought and the mental picture of the graceful and classy me, dancing the dance of life with the bee today makes you laugh. it was funny to see.

In the words of motion city sounds track, "I'm a mess I'm a wreak" but in the words of the writer, the liver and the dreamer, Carree. I'm a mess, I'm a wreak, I'm one of a kind and I'm happy. I dance to the beat of my own drum, maybe even a tambourine. But I enjoy the strangeness in life that lets you know nothing happens by chance. And anything can make you laugh if you're looking for happiness. I am who I am, and I share it with my readers. Read, learn of my oddities but don't get carree'd away!

xo carree

PS to those who have asked me about my blog. I'm way sorry I don't update as much as I should! I haven't forgotten you! I'll try to be better. BUT in all fairness I WARNED you! I tell you everytime! Don't get carree'd away! I can't help who I am and my irresistibly. Unprofessional to admit, I know, but I can't help it I'm a rebel. my dears I'll warn again, run! Don't get carree'd away!